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The Courage to Exhale: Finding Freedom in Letting Go



Even as a practitioner of Body Dialogue, exhaling isn’t always easy. I get stuck sometimes, too. Somehow, it’s hard to let go when I’m holding on to a feeling. Sometimes, I don’t even realize how restricted I am until I find my way through the narrow places and return to a sense of expanse. The prospect of letting go can seem terrifying—until I finally allow myself to get on the floor, roll, twist, reach, expand, contract, humm, sigh, release, allow my tissues to unwind, and let my movement be guided by sensation.


Body Dialogue is an improvisational process—an art of listening to the body and letting the breath lead. The mission: a full and free breath. The process: opening up those sticky places in the fascia that restrict breathing. It’s not the same as stretching; it’s more about hydrating the fascia, bringing suppleness and freedom back into the body.


Sometimes, when I have a client on the table, I can feel how much they are gripping in their body. Deep internal muscles—the ones wrapping around the bones—are holding on for dear life. Their breath is not free, and it’s as if they don’t trust the table beneath them to hold them. They feel like they have to work to keep themselves supported. Janice, the founder of Body Dialogue, often reminds me: You can’t give someone an experience on the table of something you don’t have a reference point for in yourself.


I invite the client to exhale through a gentle humming sound. Even in this simple act, they often quiver and tremble on their exhale. It’s completely new to them. Exhaling can feel scary, especially if you’re not used to letting go.


But Body Dialogue is all about awareness. There’s no shame in noticing where you are in the process. Awareness is the first step—awareness that you’re holding your breath, followed by the awareness that another possibility exists. Another reality is possible: one in which you breathe freely. And there is a path to get there.


The path isn’t uniform because we are all unique. My restriction patterns are my own, for better or worse. The journey is about learning what my patterns are and developing tools to move toward a different experience.


For example, I recently worked with a client experiencing lower back pain. We practiced some Alexander Technique and Qigong—both integral parts of Body Dialogue. I noticed he tended to stand with his hips pushed forward over his center of gravity, locking his knees and putting pressure on his lumbar spine. Once we identified this pattern, we could explore another possibility: a shape in which he unlocked his knees and allowed his pelvis to rest naturally under his shoulders, enabling his whole torso to be supported by his legs and feet underneath him.


This exploration—of noticing, releasing, and re-patterning—is the essence of Body Dialogue. It’s not just about breathing freely; it’s about finding a new relationship with your body and discovering the freedom to let go.

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